Thursday, April 2, 2009

Skipping Ahead

So remember that post a bit ago about wanting to skip ahead and get to the happy ending of my life? Well, I've been thinking about that a lot recently. Sure, it sounds nice in theory, but when it comes down to it... that's not what I want or need right now. It's true, I can think of at least one person who is pretty much exactly who I would love to have in my life 'til death do us part. But that's not what I need right now. I think I still need the freedom of being a woman of sense and independence.

Looking ahead to the me of 5 years from now, that person looks even more appealing to my sensibilities. And by then I may just be ready for more. I don't want to miss my middle, as Lorelai Gilmore would put it. I see the beginning, I see the ending I could have... and as much as I want to jump forward in time and just have it... I don't want to miss my story, my middle.

The important part isn't the result, it's the journey that takes us there. So I guess it's time for me to just live it up, go with the flow, and have a good time with my life. No more fucking around and feeling sorry for myself because things aren't turning out as well as I had hoped. No more being shitty at keeping up with people and wallowing pitiably because I don't seem to have anyone around anymore.

Yes, there are rough times. Yes, I have always gotten through them as well as I could. And now it's time to just freaking get over it.

Life - here I come.

And the sad part is I can't even bring myself to end that statement with an exclamation point.

2 comments:

  1. Loving the Gilmore Girls reference Lorelai is so cool. I love her genral view on things.

    Hugs

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  2. Unfortunately the rough stuff helps shape us as people just as much as the great times and sometimes it makes us better people. Hang in there and keep your hope alive.

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