Skipping Ahead

So remember that post a bit ago about wanting to skip ahead and get to the happy ending of my life? Well, I've been thinking about that a lot recently. Sure, it sounds nice in theory, but when it comes down to it... that's not what I want or need right now. It's true, I can think of at least one person who is pretty much exactly who I would love to have in my life 'til death do us part. But that's not what I need right now. I think I still need the freedom of being a woman of sense and independence.

Looking ahead to the me of 5 years from now, that person looks even more appealing to my sensibilities. And by then I may just be ready for more. I don't want to miss my middle, as Lorelai Gilmore would put it. I see the beginning, I see the ending I could have... and as much as I want to jump forward in time and just have it... I don't want to miss my story, my middle.

The important part isn't the result, it's the journey that takes us there. So I guess it's time for me to just live it up, go with the flow, and have a good time with my life. No more fucking around and feeling sorry for myself because things aren't turning out as well as I had hoped. No more being shitty at keeping up with people and wallowing pitiably because I don't seem to have anyone around anymore.

Yes, there are rough times. Yes, I have always gotten through them as well as I could. And now it's time to just freaking get over it.

Life - here I come.

And the sad part is I can't even bring myself to end that statement with an exclamation point.